ZAMBIA 101 (4.22.17)

Hey worms,

I’m finally writing a second one of these 101 posts, because after all I did say I’d do one once a month (look at me, pro-blogger up in here). If you have no idea wtf or why the fuck I’m doing this, go check out my first one: OMAN 101.

I got a lot of great feedback from my Oman post, which I am very happy to see. I knew I was interested in learning more about geography, but I had no idea if you guys would be down. So thank you for the lovely comments and for being open to more informative posts. (you little scholarly worms you)(I just misspelled scholarly)(then misspelled “misspelled”)(SCHOLARLY AS FUCK)

So, as you may have read, this post is all about Zambia! (Picked solely on the name) (it sounds how I imagine Fran Drescher would sound if she was getting eaten by a zombie)(think about it)

Image result for zambia on mapImage result for zambia on map






This is where Zambia is, incase you didn’t know. (how could you not, am I right)


Image result for zambia and oman mapThe third picture shows Oman and Zambia at the same time, incase you were wondering how close they were, like ya girl.

For some reason, when I found out Zambia was right next to Zimbabwe I thought Zambia was 10 times cooler. Zimbabwe just sounds cool. But this isn’t about Zimbabwe now is it? Boy, bye.

Anyways, now that I know where in the world Zambia is, now I want to know what’s so cool about Zambia?

Image result for victoria falls

Oh damn, Zambia, I see you. If you didn’t just shit your pants from how beautiful this picture of the Victorian Falls in Zambia are, get out. Just this makes Zambia on the bucket list, like hot damn. The Victorian Falls are kind of a big deal. If only you could like, I don’t know, swim in the falls right?

Image result for devil poolImage result for devil poolImage result for devil pool





THAT’S RIGHT PEOPLE. This is Devil Pool in the Victorian Falls, and oh my god, what, how, who. It looks scary af to be totally honest with you, but like hit me up Zambia. Bucket list is getting looooong.

But like where does a typical Zambian (tangent: they should’ve called themselves Zambies, just saying)(you missed a good opportunity there, people of Zambia) go home after a long day of back flipping into a watery abyss of rainbow magic? Good question, scholarly worm you, thanks for asking.

Image result for zambia home


Well, there are these interesting little shacks that seem to be the main type of Zambia home.


Image result for zambia home




Then there are these homes which are more familiar to houses around where I live.


If I lived in Zambia, I would go full out and get a thatched roof. Thatched roofs seem to be very popular in Zambia houses, which I find to be really cool since I’ve never seen a thatched roof in America. The Spanish roofing style in the second picture is fairly common in California (in fact my neighbors have that kind of roof), so I’m more impressed with the thatched roof.

Then I found this website, which talks more about the Zambia culture. Some facts that got my attention in the article were:

  • Zambia is twice the size of it’s neighbor Zimbabwe (that’s right Zambia, you show them)
  • The most widely-spoken language is Bemba (here’s a quick lesson on Bemba, if you’re interested)(I was)(Shani, Ishina lyandi nine Alli)
  • Zambia is predominantly Christian
  • Zambia won the 2012 Africa Cup of Nations, which is basically a giant football competition in Africa.
    Image result for president of zambia
    Edgar Lungu, the main homie of Zambia.

I also found out that Zambia is democratic (same Zambia same) and has a president named Edgar Lungu. That’s him –>

Image result for zambia flagThis is The flag of Zambia. I dig the colors. I dig the green. Nice one Zambia, nice.

And of course, the moment we’ve all been waiting for, here is the national anthem of Zambia. In case you were wondering why it’s in English, English is the official language of Zambia (even though Bemba is the most widely-spoken).

Alrighty guys, that was my little take on Zambia. Hope you enjoyed getting to know Zambia a bit better, and if any of you guys have extra Zambia knowledge, hit me up in the comments. Is Zambia on your bucket list now? Would you be down to go take a swim in the Devil Pool? I’m down if you are. Let’s go. Like now. I’m free for a couple hours. Why not.





23 thoughts on “ZAMBIA 101 (4.22.17)

  1. I love this! I learnt things! I always confuse Zambia and Zimbabwe. For some reason Zambia does sound cooler though. And you’re right, I could totally see Fran pronouncing zombie as Zambia. Devil Pool looks cool, but scary. I’ll come with, but I’ll stay faaaar from the edge


  2. Those falls look to damn magical! Wish I could go swim in them, even thought it looks a little terrifying. I love their anthem though! I love your writing, everything you put in brackets is always so amusing to read! You’re a really entertaining and comical writer but at the same time it’s really well crafted. I look forward to reading more of your blogs in the future 🙂


  3. Related fun fact: Zambia and Zimbabwe are only two countries in the world that start with Z, and they border each other. Furthermore, the Democratic Republic of the Congo (also called Congo-Kinshasa, which is how it is labeled on your map) was formerly called Zaire, so for a couple of decades, after Zimbabwe became independent but before Zaire changed its name, Zambia bordered every other country in the world that started with Z.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you! Here’s another fun fact. I have a friend from years ago (who occasionally reads my blog) who is the great-grandson of Frank Zamboni, the inventor of the ice resurfacing machine. That has nothing to do with Zambia, but Zamboni sounds like Zambia and Zamboni machines are cool.


      2. WHAT that’s actually the best. I’m just thinking about Zamboni boy from Ice Princess (which is totally your friend). I want to make a t-shirt of Frank Zamboni. I will drive via Zamboni. This has changed everything aha

        Liked by 1 person

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